it's always flattering to watch how the rain fall when you're in a nerve breakdown situation.
just sit there with a smoke in your hand.
watching it fell to the ground, on and on and on and on.
means that something is falling roughly, more than you are.
cause even it's too harsh and selfish to be said,
you will always find it better when you realize you're not the worst,
it's surprisingly comforting to know that something, or maybe someone is having a rough time just like you,
or maybe even worst.
so you can keep on moving forward, and hanging on your free fall
hoping you'll landed on a solid ground,
and when you do landed, you'll laugh about it with a cold beer and a single smoke,
thinking you're just woke up from a long long nightmare.
there are lot of things that could knock a guy in his head.
whether is catching a glimpse the future might hold,
or realize you're just in the most embarrassing moment in your life,
but even that's not as bad as you can get,
the worst is realizing when you're not as happy as you might think you are.
now, for some reasons, i've ended up on my consciousness,
about how i didn't work it up for the others, and my self.
about how i've been controlled by my own ego or others,
and of course,
it's the 'what ifs' that hurts the most.
'what if' i did things differently,
'what if' i stood on my feet from the beginning,
'what if' i said those three words,
'what if' i've known earlier',